How to Tell Someone Your Boundaries

So, you’ve decided that it’s time to set some boundaries in your life. Good for you! Whether it’s with family, friends, or coworkers, clear boundaries help create trust, mutual respect, and emotional safety. Once you’ve decided what your boundaries are, the next step will be communicating them to those around you. Here are some tips for how to do so:

• Be clear. Explain exactly what you expect so that there’s no room for misinterpretation. For example, if you don’t want to work evenings, say, “I’m available between 9 a.m. and 6 p.m.” rather than “I can’t work late,” since “late” can mean different things to different people.
• Establish consequences. Explain what will happen if your boundary is crossed. For instance, if your child regularly yells, say, “If you raise your voice while we’re having a conversation, I will leave the room until you calm down.” And most importantly, follow through on those consequences.
• Use the sandwich method. If you’re concerned about how the other person will react, try sandwiching your boundary between two positive statements. For example, if you’re feeling overwhelmed by how frequently your sister calls, you could say, “I love our chats, but I’ve been so busy with this new job that I’m not able to talk each night. Can we schedule a time each week to catch up?”

Do You Struggle to Set Boundaries?

Setting and communicating boundaries can be difficult, but it’s a lot easier with the help of an experienced therapist. I understand the intricacies of relationships between family members, friends, coworkers, and other acquaintances, and I’ll provide you with tailored advice on how to effectively set any necessary boundaries. Together, we can work on strategies that feel authentic and respectful, so your relationships can grow in healthier ways.